As if it is the first time

Took this from the website of my favourite writer - Paulo Coelho's Warrior of Lights. (No.145) (http://www.warriorofthelight.com) and probably the last entry in this blog.

Yes, I am going out to discover my 'first time' again. Cheers

*******

I would like to believe that I am going to look on this new year as if it were the first time that 365 days have unfolded before my eyes. To see the people around me with surprise and amazement, happy to discover that they are by my side and sharing something so often mentioned and so seldom understood, called love.

I shall climb on the first bus that comes along without asking where it is going to and I shall get off as soon as I see something that catches my attention. I shall pass by a beggar who asks me for some spare change. Maybe I’ll give him something, maybe I’ll think that he will spend it on drink and just walk past – hearing his insults and understanding that that is the way he has to communicate with me. I shall pass by someone who is trying to wreck a telephone booth. Maybe I’ll try to stop them, maybe I’ll understand that they are doing that because there is nobody to talk to on the other side of the line and that is their way of chasing off loneliness.

On each of these 365 days I shall look at everything and everybody as if it were the first time – especially the small things that I am not used to and whose magic I have forgotten. The keys of my computer, for example, that move with an energy that I fail to understand. The paper that appears on the screen and for a long time has not been revealed in a physical manner, although I believe that I am writing on a white sheet where it is easy to make corrections by pressing a key. At the side of the computer monitor are some papers that I do not have the patience to put in order, but if I feel that they are hiding something new, than all these letters, memoranda, newspaper cuttings and receipts will gain a life of their own and will have odd stories of the past and the future to tell me. So many things in the world, so many paths trodden, so many entrances and exits in my life.

I am going to put on a shirt that I wear a lot and for the first time I shall pay attention to the label and the way it was sewn, and I am going to imagine the hands that designed it and the machines that changed this design into something material and visible.

And even the things that I am used to – such as my bow and arrows, the breakfast coffee mug, the boots that have become an extension of my feet after wearing them so much – will be coated in the mystery of discovery. Let everything that my hand touches, my eyes see and my mouth taste be different now, although they been the same for many a year. In that way they will no longer be still-lifes and start to convey the secret of having been with me for such a long time, and they will show me the miracle of coming into touch again with emotions already worn down by routine.

I want to look at the sun for the first time, if the sun comes out tomorrow, or at cloudy weather, if tomorrow is overcast. Above my head there is a sky for which all of humanity - over thousands of years of observation - has given a series of reasonable explanations. Well, I shall forget everything I have ever learned about the stars, and they will once more turn into angels, or children, or anything else that I feel like believing in at the moment.

Time and life have changed everything into something perfectly understandable – and I need mystery, the thunder that is the voice of an angry god rather than just a simple electric discharge that sets off vibrations in the atmosphere. I want to fill my life again with fantasy, because an angry god is far more curious, frightening and interesting than a phenomenon of physics.

And finally, let me look at myself on each of these 365 days as if it were the first time that I was in contact with my body and my soul. Let me look at this person who walks, feels and talks like any other, let me feel surprised at his most simple gestures, like chatting to the mailman, opening his correspondence, contemplating his wife sleeping at his side, wondering what she is dreaming about.

And so I shall remain what I am and what I like to be, a constant surprise to myself. This I who was not created by my father or by my mother, nor by my school, but by all that I have lived so far - suddenly I forgot and am discovering it all over again.

end of jan, beginning of feb

It has been a while since I last blogged, I know I know....

Well, I guess like many bloggers, somehow you just move on with life, you left behind what you like to do during your spare time at work and plunge yourself right into where the actions are.

While I was not blogging, I have been

1. Busy with work. Well, my boss has been put me as a backup player for the purchasing and monitoring the incoming shipments, on top of all the other duties. Thus, my eyes has been glued to the stocklists, checking what we are lacking, and also ensuring all procedures are followed. Of all these, I hate 2 things the most, having to hear my bosses 'nag' about how the goods are slightly more expensive and also to have the goods here on time and properly distributed to our branches. It's stressful, I tell you.

2. Yeah, I mean going out with friends and hanging out and google at 'god's wonderful creation'. If you haven't check out some of the hot spots in town, you should. There is this place which we do pop into once every now and then. I tell you, sometimes it's pretty rauchy at the wee hours. Of course, at the wee hours, all I could think of was 'Are we home yet?' and hoping, we wont get any road blocks driving home. But, I enjoy my night out with my friends.

3. My friends has been trying to play match-match for me. There is this image consultant, then a massuer, a sales manager and a vet..

Moi: A vet?
Ami 1: Damn cute la. Definitely your type.
Moi: Alright but does this person smell like a horse?
Ami 1: No, only the smell of a cat.
Moi: tempting...

Well, I am cool about meeting more friends and I am as my friend put it, "in control of my situation", and most important, I am not desperate for a partner yet.

4. Puffy is doing good too. Of course, he has to be re-train as he is still getting use to the new house. He is still as adorable as always. I just send him for a haircut and now he looked good. Sometimes I imagine him a rabbit. Oh, I wish I can show you how he sit at the balcony watching some of the people walking at the garden. It's a sight to behold. (Perhaps a picture later)

5. I have been watching my weight lately and I am happy to say I am working toward my ideal weight. Yeah, I will do it right this time. Of course, er there is a company BBQ coming soon. Darn.... I heard, on the menu, there will be prawns, crabss and oysters... aiksssssss.

6. Kinda am broke lately too with the new house, and the partying. Not going to spend a lot on chinese new year, perhaps going to get a pair of new shoes which I have been eyeing since december. By the way, my friend did asked me if I want to buy a watch which he is thinking of disposing. I like the watch but I am tight on budget. So... next time la.

7. My travel plan is a bit up and down. Was supposed to go to Indonesia on a business trip but cancelled on the last minute. The trip to Germany will probably wont materialised since we will have a huge event in March here. The US trip is not confirmed as well, as the event has been moved and only selected players can take part in it. And the trip to Nepal, ahhhhhhhh will only be confirmed once I get to speak again to my uncle in April, perhaps.

8. I will be staying put in KL during the chinese festival season. I guess I will have a good rest.

OK.. that's all folks, for today.

What's your seduction style?

And still we sleep....

I shall start my entry with a poem and the resolutions for 2007.

*****

We are dreaming of tomorrow and tomorrow isn't coming,
We are dreaming of a glory that we don't really want.
We are dreaming of a new day when the new day's here already.
We are running from the battle when it's one that must be fought."

And still we sleep.

We are listening for the calling but never really heeding,
Hoping for the future when the future's only plans.
Dreaming of the wisdom that we are dodging daily,
Praying for a savior when salvation's in our hands."

And still we sleep.

And still we dream.
And still we pray.
And still we fear.
And still we sleep.

Taken from http://www.peterweircave.com/dps/comparison.html

Resolutions

1. To control and tame myself and my temper.

2. To start moving with the career plan.

3. To find my 'nirvana' and be good.

Ultimately, to be happy in everything that I am doing.

5 days to ho ho ho

1. We are officially getting the keys to the house today though there are still a few outstanding things which are not fixed. I think I have given enough notices to all parties and I shall start to do it my way and charge them for anything outstanding. I am also puking sometimes talking and explaining things to people. Yeah, I can be really impatient sometimes. So.. a point to note.

2. Work is progressing well but knowing the style my boss is working and planning, I know, a lot of things will only be plans for many years to come. We have this joke among us that if we work here for another 20 years, the best car we can drive would only be a Proton.

3. My plan for Penang is off since I will be busy with the new house. We are moving so that we dont have to pay another month of rent which can be used for the house instalments. Hmm A good thing in a way. I still have a lot of things not in place yet since I dont have time to really go searching for furnitures. I guess one thing at a time.

4. Yesterday, my colleague (THE bitch) had a fight with my lady boss. I am impressed with her courages to speak on top of her voice. I really dont know it was whose fault but in my humble opinion, NEVER raise your voice to the person who sign your paycheck! In the words of my 'mighty' boss all the time - THEY STILL HAVE NOT MANAGED TO KNOW THE SITUATION!

5. My friends and I are going to have some Xmas club hopping this saturday night. Yeah and I shall tell you about my googling experiences the next time. Like real like that.

6. I am greatly indebt with a friend of mine who has been helping me a lot over the last few months. He recommended me some contractors and I got good prices for their jobs. He brings me to club and open my eyes to a whole ocean of fishes. He has done many things for me which if i list it out, I will have to spend the whole day typing it. ;) I am forever grateful man.

7. Called 'someone' the other day and we spoke for a while. He sounds like a pretty nice person but that's just the first impression.

8. I am having a early Xmas christmas dinner with my friends tonight and I make some gifts for them.

Carol 2007

The Little Drummer boy

Come they told me, pa rum pum pum pum
A new born King to see, pa rum pum pum pum
Our finest gifts we bring, pa rum pum pum pum
To lay before the King, pa rum pum pum pum,
rum pum pum pum, rum pum pum pum,
So to honor Him, pa rum pum pum pum,
When we come.

Baby Jesus, pa rum pum pum pum
I am a poor boy too, pa rum pum pum pum
I have no gift to bring, pa rum pum pum pum
That's fit to give the King, pa rum pum pum pum,
rum pum pum pum, rum pum pum pum,
Shall I play for you, pa rum pum pum pum,
On my drum?

Mary nodded, pa rum pum pum pum
The ox and lamb kept time, pa rum pum pum pum
I played my drum for Him, pa rum pum pum pum
I played my best for Him, pa rum pum pum pum,
rum pum pum pum, rum pum pum pum,
Then He smiled at me, pa rum pum pum pum
Me and my drum.


The words and music to the Christmas song Little Drummer Boy was composed by Katherine K. Davis, Henry Onorati and Harry Simeone in 1958. The lyrics of Little Drummer Boy consist of no less than 21 rum pum pum pum' - a major part of the song and therefore presenting an apparently easy task for the lyricist! However, Little Drummer Boy has been a huge hit for several artists. The most notable rendition was created by the most unlikely combination of Bing Crosby and David Bowie. This version of Little Drummer Boy was a massive hot for the artists and was in fact Bing Crosby's most successful recording since the legendary White Christmas.

Dear santa

Dear Santa,

It's the time of the year again.

I have been a very good boy this year with the exception of a few things which I think we can sweep under the carpet whenever possible.

So, here goes my top 10 Christmas' wish (in no particular order). Yeah something attainable this year, I presummed.

1. A Tiret watch
2. A white cold snowy christmas.
3. A healthy body mind soul.
4. A week of enjoyable holiday from the 25th right up to next year.
5. A new computer, probably a powerbook.
6. A Nokia N80
7. A Apple ipod HIFI
8. A messenger bag
9. A sound system for my room.
10. A ipod sock

Luv, Cava

p/s: if you can deliver one day earlier, I would appreciate it, Santa.

****

Some goods news to rejoice in the season of advent.
1. I might be going to Germany in the first quarter next year. Yuppie.
2. I am getting some extra bonuses next year too if the plans works well
3. Puffy will have three stories to run around when we move
4. I might be going to Nepal middle of next year
5. I might be moving on if No.4 works out well
6. Works has been ok and since the fair is over, yuppie, I can concentrate on some personal stuff now
7. Might be going to Penang for a short trip end of the month


Notes (things to do)
1. Send out my Christmas card
2. Get Puffy's biscuits and basket
3. Do up the Locoroco card as promised to my little cousin
4. Call my friends for the season's greeting
5. Finish up the website
6. Finalised the product planning list
7. Do christmas shopping
8. Clean new house
9. Watch DVD - Volver, that I just bought
10. Send photocopy of passport